Speaking off camera an anonymous spokesman for the Norfolk Association of Village Idiots and Losers (NAVIL) said
“After a long discussion and much careful consideration we concluded that British Minister of Defence Ben Wallace would be invited as our guest of honour for his sustained lack of military success in Ukraine whilst simultaneously spaffing £billions up the wall with nothing but death, defeat and shame to show for it.”
“Of particular note and deserving of mention in despatches was his idiotic assertion reported by the BBC that “97% of the Russian army is now estimated to be in Ukraine”. Such obvious bollox immediately gained the respect of our membership, we welcome Ben to the fold.
“We also congratulate Honourable Idiot Ben Wallace for supplying his fellow fool Ukrainian Neo-Nazi Zelensky with the toxic depleted uranium now widely distributed over Europe. Losing the war, poisoning the air and contaminating the food chain now that’s beyond stupid, we feel that Ben an irresponsible fool will fit right in here. He is an inspirational role model and a shining example to all aspiring idiots”