Bloomin’ eck. Party Chairman escapes assassination by inches.

Erhan, my Turkish friend, who’s lived in England for twenty years, now a citizen with a young family, and I came home from the English Democrats autumn conference in Nottingham late last night.  He particularly liked Godfrey Bloom’s talk, and it was interesting to hear so many speakers knowledgeable in their own fields giving insights and information you would never find anywhere else, not least from Robin Tilbrook, Party Chairman and Founder in 2002, who is a shrewd observer of the political scene.

Ned Pamphilon sang his brilliant and moving song England Calling after lunch, and I did my usual update on the campaign work we are doing and a section on Silver as money, which silver was since time began until 1914.

I had arrived on Friday evening to see my name was nowhere on the list of speakers, which I found somewhat deflating.  The next day Robin sauntered over after breakfast, and said that the Party Treasurer was going to be late so could I take his slot.  Of course, I replied, but the Treasurer slot is only 15 minutes and my speech is 40 minutes.  In the break I went upstairs to my room, rewrote my forty minute effort down to 15 minutes on the back of a white A5 envelope.  Actually it improved it!  But I had to drop off a lot of detail which was a shame.

Just before we went back in, and my speech was ten minutes away, Robin sauntered over again and told me that Godfrey Bloom, who was talking right after me, was happy to do less than an hour so I could go back up to about 30 minutes if I wished.  ‘Bloomin’ Eck, Robin,’ I said.  ‘I’ve just rewritten my speech down to fifteen minutes – but never mind, I’ll use the old speech notes and jump between the two versions!  Which I did.

I showed my tiny hand flag of the English White Dragon which I carry around when leafleting along with the flag of St George.  Not many know that the English flag originally was the White Dragon, not dissimilar to the Welsh Red Dragon.  Robin announced that the change of the English flag took place to the St George Cross in 13 hundred and something – very impressive historical knowledge about England he has!  Then he walked over to the seven foot standard at the back of the room and raised the hanging red flag to reveal a sizeable white dragon to the audience of number around 40+.  The standard tipped towards him as he spoke, and as he wasn’t looking as it fell, it just missed giving him a serious crack on the nut by inches.

Dragons do that sort of thing, I declared to a chuckling audience, as Robin put the standard and flag back into place, seemingly unruffled by his near encounter with an accelerating two inch diameter wooden pole.

I won’t describe it all.

Everything was filmed by Jeff Taylor of the famous Youtube Channel.  The dragon attempting to assassinate the party leader was not caught on camera thankfully, as the camera was fixed in position facing the podium.  Otherwise the incident would have gone viral and given the Teds a massive internet hit trivialising our efforts.  Most of the wisdom of the conference will probably be passed over as it is, by the millions outside the hotel.

But you never know.  The message of optimism and hope could spin its way to more eyes and ears.

Ned loved the conference.  He drew all the cartoons for the Teds campaign, and designed an amazing badge which everyone wanted to buy.  Godfrey Bloom went to the podium wearing one before enlightening us about the Ukraine war, and consigning our political enemies to the dustcart, drawing laughter and then many questions from his audience.

I am sure that that badge will be seen around in increasing numbers.

Everything was indeed bloomin’.




2 Responses to “Bloomin’ eck. Party Chairman escapes assassination by inches.”

  1. pete fairhurst 2 says:

    You had me going with that headline Tap! My immediate reaction, before I read the article, was “You must be doing something right then!”

  2. Tapestry says:

    It was more like a suicide attempt in fact, but the dragon saved him.