The Goddard Inquiry into child sexual abuse still hasn’t heard its first evidence, but it has already lost the trust of some survivors.
Esther Baker is one of them. In the early days she saw the inquiry as an opportunity to finally disclose her wretched childhood.
Being abused simply became part of her routine. She learnt to cope by repeating nursery rhymes or her times tables in her head as countless men took advantage of her.
The promises in recent months from politicians vowing to “uncover the truth” and “leave no stone unturned” gave her the hope that this time might be different.
She engaged with the process, took part in meetings and even received a letter from Home Secretary Theresa May thanking her for her “invaluable assistance”.
Ms Baker though has lost faith in the process.
Justice Lowell Goddard was the third choice to lead the inquiry and was brought over from New Zealand to ensure she was independent of the British establishment, which finds itself at the centre of many allegations of child abuse.
Ms Baker will wait and see how Justice Goddard performs.
But the false starts, the disagreements and infighting between survivor groups and having her private meetings recorded and then leaked to a newspaper have left her disillusioned.
She said: “At this stage now I don’t trust the inquiry. When I first went into it I did. I put all my trust in it really.
“It feels dirty, the inquiry to me. I don’t think they understand how fake it feels now. It feels stage managed and it feels like it is a game.
“It feels like they are playing a game with survivors now.”
The scope of the inquiry is so wide that it will take years to wade through the troubling and complex evidence.
Some would like it to be wider still. The Kincora children’s home in Belfast, where children were allegedly trafficked to England to be abused, will still not figure under current plans.
A Home Office spokesperson said: “The Home Secretary set up the independent inquiry, under the chairmanship of Justice Goddard, to examine the extent to which abuse has taken place in state and non-state institutions in England and Wales.
“She is confident the inquiry will establish why it was possible for such abuse to take place and challenge individuals and institutions without fear or favour.”
Ms Baker’s is just one of thousands of stories.
Last year at the sentencing of John Allen, a care home boss from north Wales who abused youngsters for decades, the judge said he had seen a “procession of sad broken men” pass through the witness box.
The reality is that there is a procession of individuals to be found in every corner of the UK.
Survivors of abuse are not one group of people. They are all individuals who have suffered in different ways and who want different things.
Justice Goddard has an enormous job on her hands.